Category Archives: author update

Another (Manic) Monday

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Words: 2307
Time to read: 12 minutes (Sorry!)

I guess I used the wrong M word.

It seems odd that Mondays come around so fast. My weekends are Monday through Wednesday, then boom, I’m working the rest of the week wondering why I only got through half a chapter. Last week was different as my daughter started her first job and we were getting used to her schedule. Because I wasn’t feeling well for the past four years, she’s eighteen and doesn’t have her driver’s license yet. I take responsibility for that, never feeling good enough to drive with her, and I had to give her rides. So, being in the car on the days I have off will take some time away–I just need to use the time I do have better.

On Wednesday, I went to Best Buy and bought a new Mac. My T was driving me insane and I wanted to replace my computer before it gave out completely. Now that I don’t have to push on the keys so hard to type, I’m hoping some of my carpal tunnel pain will go away, too. My arms would ache after a long typing session, so replacing my old laptop (it was seven years old!) was a must. It’s a little smaller than the one I had before, so I regret getting another MacBook Air and not the Pro, but the images are sharper so maybe that will make up for it. I saved the receipt they emailed me under my 2024 Book Spend as I fully intend to give it to my tax guy as a writing expense.

That leaves me with only one more thing to do when it comes to adulting, and that’s to make an appointment for new glasses. I’ve been putting it off because I’m so sick of doctors, but like finally spending the money on a new computer, I think I’ll like having new glasses since they’re two years old and more scratched up than my furniture (I used to have three cats). I think once I get that taken care of I won’t have to adult for the rest of the year. I’m still trying to find some normalcy when it comes to how I feel. I rarely drink anymore, and that’s helped a lot. I still get nauseated sometimes and overall just feel “off” but that’s probably due to hormones more than anything else, and I’m already on birth control to keep my ovaries steady. Since there’s not much more I can do about that, I have to take each day as it comes and if I’m feeling good, enjoy, and if I’m feeling not so good, stay home and rest. At almost fifty, I could be worse off, so I’m trying to be grateful for what I have.

As far as writing is concerned, I’m trying to get through edits of my old third person series. I’m in the middle of book three (of four), and while I can honestly say I’m enjoying the stories, either my writing style has changed or I just got that much better, but it seems almost every sentence needs some kind of tweaking. I’m taking out a lot that slows down the pace, on a paragraph/sentence level, and then adding more words to plump up scenes here and there and finish conversations where the characters just seem to sputter out. I mean, when someone says, “Have a nice day,” someone else doesn’t just get up and walk away without saying anything back or at least acknowledging it in some way. It was a weird thing I held on to all the way until last year. But while I can say I’m enjoying the stories because I haven’t read them in so long, it’s a freaking pain in the butt and a project I honestly didn’t think would need so much time and work. So, I’m dragging my feet, but knowing it has to be done, and the only thing keeping me going is the fact that these books are going to sound SO GOOD when I’m finished. Could be for nothing–does anyone read third person anymore? I have no idea, but it will be interesting to see what they do with new covers and a little ad money thrown at them. That may be my experiment for 2025.

Book two of my King’s Crossing series will be out this month, on the 28th, I think, and I’m getting some good feedback on Booksprout already. I have a couple preorders for it, literally, two the last time I looked, but I didn’t put them up for preorders for people to actually do it, anyway, so that’s fine. Just passing along the information that my preorders are there, Amazon hasn’t messed with them (yet), and they look good on my Amazon author page.

What am I going to do for the rest of the year? Well, get my old series done ASAP. I’d like to promote it in December if at all possible, and then I’m going dive into a standalone that I wrote a couple years ago. I read through it once since I wrote it and made some notes on what needs to be fixed. Add more chemistry between the characters, fix a few inconsistencies, that kind of thing. I have him wearing jeans when he would never wear jeans–he’s just not the type. Now that I know most (hopefully all) of my writing ticks, like overusing words like “with” and “where” “for” and “from” and dialogue fading off into the sunset, I’ll be able to whip that book into shape pretty easily (as easily as 109k words can get whipped into shape). Don’t know if I’ll find a beta reader for it or not. I love my coworker and value her time but in the end she doesn’t give me the real feedback I need to make the story better. After working with someone who backed out of reading my trilogy last year (when I had given her so much of my time, too), I kind of soured on working with anyone, as detrimental to my career as that may be. I don’t think too many people really admit that they write, package, and publish their books all their own because being a one-stop-shop has a bad reputation, and rightly so. It takes a village to raise a child, and it also takes a village to publish a book. Too bad sometimes my village resembles more of a ghost town these days. Not a whole lot you can do about it either, especially since paying for services doesn’t mean you’re going to get what you pay for, or anything at all.

I sound like I’m whining, but I think it’s a reality for a lot of authors now. We can try to make connections and friends, but the sad truth is, people are too busy. Too busy with life, too busy working on their own stuff, too busy with the friends they already have. I should probably be grateful I can do so much on my own because I know there are authors who can’t and I feel sorry for anyone who has to wade through the scammers and the people who aren’t qualified to offer the services they offer to find real help. Anyway, so that’s what I’ll be doing for the last three months of the year, besides living it up on my birthday on Thanksgiving Day. My ex-husband said he’d come over and cook dinner so I wouldn’t have to, so I may just end up sitting around drinking Prosecco and eating chips and dip. I’ll definitely have stuff to celebrate, like my King’s Crossing series finally out into the world, my old series hopefully done by then, saying goodbye to all my undiagnosed health issues. 2024 was rollercoaster and I threw up a few times, but maybe I can get off this crazy ride in 2025. I would welcome solid ground under my feet.

My Goodreads giveaway is losing steam, but as the days go on and more giveaways are added to the list, that’s to be expected. An author is supposed to do their own promotion after all, but I already tapped out my FB author page, my Instagram, and my newsletter. All I can do now is boost a post here and there, so I might do that before the giveaway ends on the 25th.

I think my newsletter signups are getting sick of me as I lost ten in the past week, and I only had a 29% open rate for my most recent newsletter. That’s not great, but since I’m treating it more like a blog than a newsletter and posting more for the public consumption of it, I guess I’ll have to expect people who signed up to react to the shift in vibe and opt out. That’s fine, maybe a little counterproductive since I want people to sign up rather than unsubscribe, but my sales have also dropped which means fewer people signing up from my books’ back matter. I’m not sure what to do about it at this point because it sounds like a lot of us are struggling. The best thing for me at the moment is just to keep my eyes on the end of the year. I would be really disappointed in myself if I didn’t finish editing my series. I was the one who started it in the first place and doing the relaunch over the holidays would be perfect.

That’s about all I have for this week, but I’ll leave you with a warning. You know I keep my opinions on AI to myself. I’m careful how I use it and use it very little. I like to brainstorm with Al about blog subject lines or hooky tag lines for ads because I’m bad at that, but I’ve never used it to generate photos or write for me. I’ve never written a blog post with it, never used it to edit my books. Mostly because I’m not interested–the things Al does I can do myself, and an AI photo generator doesn’t offer anything you can’t find on DepositPhotos. But if you do use it to generate pictures for a blog post, aesthetics, ads, social media graphics, or for your book covers, or if you use ChatGPT to edit for you or write portions of your books, you need to be careful because not everyone is going to be so blasé about it. There are witch hunts online, a lot of it on Threads, some in FB groups, and there’s a list going around of authors who use it. I don’t condone this list (like my lovely governor says, Mind Your Own Damn Business) and don’t know any of the authors on it, so far, but all it takes is one person to add your name and that will never go away. (Screenshots are forever, my friend.) That’s not the kind of word of mouth you want.

I know the writing community is small, I know that in comparison the reading community is a thousand times larger and maybe you don’t care what other authors think of you so long as readers like your books. That’s okay. I don’t bow down to the author community, but I have been ganged up on on Twitter, and it’s brutal on your mental health. There’s also a list of authors going around who are against AI, but I didn’t put my name on it. I started adding a disclaimer to the copyright pages of my books saying I don’t use AI for my book creation, and I’ll continue to add that, but I do it for myself and my readers. I’ve never done something just because someone else has told me to, and I don’t expect you to stay away from AI if you like using it just because I said so. But if you keep your ear to the ground, you’ll know this subject is hot and it would be bad to land on the wrong side.

I use this blog to pass around information I hear and hopefully help you make informed choices about your own book business. I’ve been on social media for a long time and this AI hate is on a level I’ve never seen before. It’s best to stay away from it or don’t announce it if you’re using it (though that can be for naught as people are pretty good at spotting it). I personally don’t care either way, this blog is a safe place for everyone, but I would be remiss if I didn’t at least mention it because like I said, this is a level of hate I’ve never seen before and the mob mentality oftentimes leaves me speechless.

I hope you have a good week, and I’ll see what kind of progress I can make on my series. Hoping to get book three done would be asking way too much, but if I could get close, I would be very happy.

Until next time!

Author Update and SMH

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Words: 1299
Time to read: 7 minutes

So, there have been a couple things going on that just make me shake my head because I have too much going on to care, and while I do take interest in most things, if my energy allows it, I’ll be patient and see what happens.

I guess there’s been some issues with the founder of WordPress and WP Engine who uses the… I want to call it software, but I guess it’s technology? I’m not really sure, but I did a little snooping and my website isn’t run by WP Engine, it’s through WordPress directly. I don’t know how any of that is going to affect anyone’s websites now, and it seems a lot of people are panicking and pulling their websites that use WordPress technology down and going with something else. From what I understand, a lot of websites are built using WordPress, but are hosted by someone else like GoDaddy. I never went with a different host, even knowing I wouldn’t have all the flexibility, but I never minded. My website and blog does what I want it to do. Not to mention, I’m not very tech savvy, and fighting to create a website didn’t interest me. (Not back then. I was too busy trying to figure out how to format my freaking books!) Anyway, since the issue is really with the founder of WordPress and the people who run WP Engine, I think I’m safe. Listening to my gut has paid off before, so I’ll wait it out and see what happens. Moving my websites somewhere else, or breaking off from WordPress hosting and going with a different host sounds like a headache and nothing I want to tackle. I did export my blog posts from January of 2018 (the first two years I blogged are a disaster and that information is probably useless anyway) up until now. That would be a lot of words to suddenly lose, and maybe it’s a good idea to do that once in a while anyway. TechCrunch summarized what’s been going on and you can read it here: https://techcrunch.com/2024/09/27/wordpress-vs-wp-engine-drama-explained/

In other news, my Goodreads giveaway is doing fine, and just under a week I already have over 900 entries. If you want to enter, click here: https://www.goodreads.com/giveaway/enter_kindle_giveaway/397874-cruel-fate

I’m not actually sure what I expected, but I’m grateful there seems to be interest.

screenshot of goodreads giveaway
screenshot of goodreads 877 people want to read

I knew this giveaway would plump up my “want to read” numbers, and that’s cool, too. I don’t do much with Goodreads, haven’t even bothered to change the old covers on some of my books. I don’t know really, if Goodreads is safe for an author who reads, and at this point, with all my health issues and other things going on, I don’t think I want to add another platform anyway. Alessandra Torre is a huge Goodreads cheerleader, and you can read (and watch) how she uses it here: https://www.alessandratorreink.com/home/2017/5/12/grpromo

She has quite a bit of information out there on how to use Goodreads, just search “Alessandra Torre how to use Goodreads,” and a lot of information comes up. I don’t read as much as I should, so maybe Goodreads isn’t that great of a place to hang out if you don’t, but I don’t think once a reader becomes an author that it’s an author’s place to review another author’s work. I see authors all the time who defend their right to say what they want, but then when they get an “honest” review of their work, they can’t handle it. Don’t be in the kitchen if you can’t stand the heat is all I have to say to that. You all know my stance. Stay out of reader spaces (even if you are one!). Leave people alone. Go write your next book. There are actually some things you don’t have to tell anyone about. Imagine.

Now that I got my sarcasm out of the way for today, no, I don’t think I plan to be on Goodreads all that much, even during/after my giveaway. This was mostly an experiment in paying for exposure, and I have no idea really if it’s even worth it. I have Amazon ads going to my series, and I’m getting quite a few clicks and lots of impressions, but all my books will be released into KU and that’s what my readers will wait for. I’m not running ads hoping for preorders, even though I dropped the preorder price on books two and three. Book one is still .99 and probably will be until the last book comes out in April. I’m trying to be pragmatic about this release, realistic, and even though they call it “rapid release” I know I won’t see any real movement until they’re all out.

I have a lot of thoughts on paying for exposure, and maybe I’ll do a blog post about it sometime. For now, let’s move on.

Actually, there’s not a lot to move on to. I’m still editing my series, and I did get done with book two on Friday after our trip to the zoo and the junk market and started book three while I was at work on Saturday. Book two needed some work, some plumping up, and I know why. That was the first book I wrote and I remember thinking it was too “quiet” to carry a series and I decided to make book two book one. Now that I’m reading them with fresh eyes, I think book two would have been an okay book one, but I hadn’t gotten into the flow of the characters and I added 1500 words to book two. That took a little time, and I added a lot to the ending because it didn’t quite make sense. I think I learned a lot writing my King’s Crossing series, handling all that plot and all those details. I have a better memory than I did when I wrote my Rocky Point series, or maybe I was just in a rush to publish and didn’t work on them as hard as I should/could have. Hard to say since I published them in 2018, and that feels like a lifetime ago now. Still, never too late to fix a mistake, and these will sound good when I’m done. I’d like to celebrate their rerelease since some authors do that, maybe do a couple of lives if I can get up the courage and I’ll order some author copies to give away. I know I need to start being more active online, engage with people more. I’m not sure why I have problems with it. Hiding behind a screen is the easiest way to communicate with people.

That’s really all I have left. My ex-husband has a key to my apartment (it was ours before we divorced and he kept his in case of an emergency) and he does weird things like come over while I’m working and drops off bags of garden veg he gets from somewhere. He did that a couple weeks ago and I put the squash on my balcony, jokingly referring to it as my fall aesthetic because I’m terrible at decorating. So, you all know I feed the squirrels and one of them decided to turn my fall aesthetic into a snack. She completely ripped the guts out of one and scattered them all over the balcony. But, she’s enjoying it, and I’ll let her have at it until there’s nothing left.

Squirrel eating squash
I took the picture through my screen so I wouldn’t disturb her.

That’s all I have for this week. I’m praying for everyone who was affected by Hurricane Helene. I’ve seen some pictures and read on Threads what’s been going on and I feel for everyone who has suffered. My thoughts are with you.

Until next time.

Housekeeping Update and Verifying Your Email Address on Goodreads

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Words: 1364
Time to read: 7 minutes

pumpkins, sliced blood oranges, and stick of cinnamon on flat wood. text says Housekeeping Update and Verifying Your Email Address on Goodreads

I thought I would switch it up a little because all I did last week was housekeeping. I put the rest of my King’s Crossing books on preorder. I have the paperbacks to books two and three scheduled, but Amazon doesn’t let you schedule out that far in advance, so I’ll have to go back at the end of December and schedule the other three paperbacks. It’s fine, I was just hoping to get it all done at once. But, they’re all up on preorder besides book one that’s live, and they’re pretty to look at. I still have to write a series blurb. It’s on my to-do list, but I’m slowly checking things off so I should be able to get to it soon. You can see them here. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CX7SFGB5

Something else annoying is I had to contact Goodreads, again, and ask that all my books be moved over to my “real” profile as opposed to my fake one. My fake one doesn’t have dots between my initials like my pen name, but my “real” profile does, as that’s some kind of Goodreads requirement. I have to contact a librarian to have my books moved over every time I publish, and it’s mildly annoying. They’re pretty good about getting to it in a decent amount of time, though, and they were moved over the day I posted in the Librarians Group. It’s not really a big deal besides the fact I have to do it at all. This time I had an extra run around and had to verify my email address before they would let me post. That took me a few extra minutes because I didn’t know how to do that. If you’re ever asked to verify your email, this is what you do:

Click on your profile picture in the upper right.

Go to Account Settings at the bottom of the menu.

Then click on Edit Profile.

Once you’re there, click on Settings.

After Settings you’ll see where your email is. If it’s not verified, click the link and it will send a verification email to your email address.

Mine is already verified, so it doesn’t show it anymore, but if yours isn’t you might wanna go ahead and do it while you’re thinking of it. It might save you some issues in the long run, or trying to find this post for the instructions later.

How to do it was buried, as you can see, and Googling the instructions wasn’t that helpful, but it did at least send me in the right direction.

Anyway, so I verified my email and posted in the Librarians Group to move my books over, which they did.

Because of a crappy post on saw on Threads, calling Amazon criminal for charging for Goodreads giveaways, I set one up, almost out of spite. I’ve seen some really asinine things over there lately, and I realized it’s because a lot of those authors are new and don’t remember how things used to be (if you’re new as well and want to read some of the scammy things authors used to do, read here: https://vaniamargene.com/2020/05/04/scammers-gonna-scam/), don’t know how things should be done, or think they should be getting something for nothing. The Goodreads argument is valid, I can admit, considering they used to be free, but newsletter promo sites like Written Word Media, E-reader News Today, Fussy Librarian, et. al. have always charged, so when Amazon said Goodreads would start charging, it wasn’t that much of a surprise. I’ve heard conflicting stories of how effective they are, but at $119 USD, it wasn’t that costly of an experiment and I didn’t have to use any of my free days. So, I’m giving away 100 ebook copies of Cruel Fate, hoping to build some buzz for the series.

I didn’t realize you had to choose between ebooks and paperbacks, and I mistakenly ordered five author copies of Cruel Fate thinking I would need them for a mixed giveaway. So, now I have five paperback books coming, but maybe I’ll just run a giveaway on my Facebook author page in conjunction with the Goodreads giveaway and see what happens. I could have canceled the order, but I didn’t see the harm in having some on hand. The giveaway goes from September 25th to October 25th, which is good timing since the second book releases October 28th.

I’m still editing my A Rocky Point Wedding series, getting close to being done with book two. I took a couple days and read book four for pleasure (Autumn and Cole are my favorite characters in the series), noting some of the changes that would need to be made, mostly tightening up prose. I have three and a half chapters left of book two, but it’s a lot considering each chapter has about 7,000 words in it. I don’t know what I was thinking, chopping it up that way, but I do remember back when I wrote in 3rd person I didn’t break up my books until the editing phase. If I ever write 3rd person again, I’ll write the chapters in as I go. Switching to dual 1st person didn’t leave me a choice, so maybe writing in chapters would be more natural for me. I don’t mind working and reading in 3rd after so many years writing in first, and once I’m doing editing these, I’ll continue on with my “break” and read a few more books I’ve been putting off. Because once I go back to writing 1st person, I’ll stay in that lane for a while.

As far as personal things go, I’m taking Friday off work and going to large zoo 45 minutes from here with my sister and my daughter, and after that the fairgrounds in Fargo, ND is hosting a junk market. I love poking through antiques and stuff. There’s a fee to get in, unfortunately, so we’ll be paying to browse, but it will be nice to spend the day outside in cooler temperatures. It will be a long day for me as I’m still not used to doing so much all at once, but hopefully I feel okay and I’m very much hoping book two will be done by then so I can start on book three on Saturday.

So, things are moving along. I also started some Amazon ads on my series hoping to get some exposure. That’s all it is right now since preorders are usually a waste for me. Readers just wait until they’re available in KU, and I know that, and that’s fine. I very much know that every click on those ads is for exposure (I’ve only had one person read Cruel Fate in KU since release so far), but sometimes there’s no other way. Once I get a series blurb down I’ll create a FB ad for it too. Those clicks are usually cheaper anyway, but I need a good series blurb and tagline or the ads won’t do anything. I learned with my FB ads for my rockstars that you need a hooky hooky hook or no one will care. But that tracks–it takes a lot to care about anything these days. (Is it still COVID languishing or election fatigue?)

I think that is all for now. In the coming months, since there are weeks I struggle to find anything to write about, I may feature an old blog post that has done well, and muse about if I still agree with what I wrote or if my opinions have changed. I don’t mind admitting if I’ve changed my mind since we all grow and learn. It would be an interesting series, anyway, so we’ll see. Threads throws up different ideas here and there, but a lot of it right now is just Amazon hate, ISBN confusion because people need free ways to publish and ISBNs are expensive in the US, and people wondering why their books won’t sell when they have bad covers. It’s pretty par for the course, really, but nothing I can blog about.

Enjoy your week, and next Monday I’ll let you know if I find anything at the junk market!

Until next time!

Monday’s Author Update

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I’ve actually had other things to write about lately, which is a surprise as well as a gift, so this week I can catch you up on what I’ve been doing without feeling bad.

Putting up my King’s Crossing series is slow. I’ve done two so far, hopefully three by the time you read this. I’ve been spacing them out because I didn’t know if putting all six up for preorder would anger some Amazon god. They already asked me for proof of licensing for the stock photos I used for book two. They accepted the DepositPhoto screenshots of my account and the licensing agreements and approved my book on the same day, but I decided to wait a couple days between that approval and book three. That happened on Wednesday, so I put up the third book on Saturday. At this rate it will take me a whole week to get everything up on preorder, which is silly since the first book is scheduled to go live on Monday, uh, today. I can’t even do anything until they’re all available in some way, can’t run ads and I haven’t really posted anywhere the first book is close to being released.

With a series, it’s a double-edged sword. You want people to know your books are coming out, or have been released, but few readers will dive into the first book before they know a series is complete and well, I don’t want them to because I know read through is where the royalties and happy readers are. In fact, someone on Booksprout thanked me for putting all of them up to read. I told her, of course, I don’t know how a reader would read them any other way. I’ve talked a lot about series before, so I’ll leave it there, but for me I can’t do anything until I have all the links. Until they’re all showing up on my Amazon author page. Then, and only then, will I start paying for traffic.

I did a crazy thing, too, and started re-editing my A Rocky Point Wedding series, a 3rd person series I released back in 2018. I had a friend say she read them, then someone else was reading them in KU not long ago, and I just couldn’t stand it anymore. I knew they needed work–I’ve learned a lot and have gotten better at self-editing in the six years since I’ve published them–so just to keep myself from going insane, I decided now would be a good time. I have the time while my King’s Crossing series is releasing and if I can get them done by December, I can push them hard because they take place around Christmas. I’ve already finished book one, and I estimate each book is going to take about two, maybe three, weeks. One week, possibly a week and a half, to do the initial edit, then another week to read it again to make sure what I fixed makes sense. These books are shorter, about 75k words on average, and that helps too, since most of my first person books hit 100k. I really like this series and I’m having fun.

I’ll take the opportunity to freshen up the insides, formatting-wise, and I can update my author bio and my ALSO BY list. I figured it can’t hurt to put my pen name books in the backs and I’ll direct people to my VM Rheault website just for kicks since I didn’t have a call to action (CTA) in the back matter anyway.

All in all, it shouldn’t take too long, maybe be done by the middle of November, then I can hype them up a little bit longer and take the rest of the month off, and December too, for a break and not think about book things during the holidays.

When the first of the New Year hits, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I have a standalone that needs editing, so I can put that up after my King’s Crossing series has been released. Do you want to see the cover? I have a concept done already. Wait. What? Am I redoing the covers for my Rocky Point series? I’m glad you asked, because, yes, I am! I mean, yes I did. I am very sorry to say, as much as I loved, absolutely adored, looking for couples to help my friend Melody with her covers, I just couldn’t do it anymore, and breaking with the brand I was building under my Vania Rheault name, decided to go with single characters. Which actually turned out because of what the titles are. You’ll see for yourself.

Unless Amazon thinks Autumn is showing too much cleavage, I’ll finally be able to run ads to these. My ads were always blocked before because the characters were showing too much skin in bed.

Quite a change, but I think they look sleeker, simpler, and more angsty than the original covers. I may explore different fonts since I know the title isn’t legible at thumbnail size, but honestly, with the product page blaring the title and the blurb, I’m not sure how much difference that makes.

Hopefully the new covers and edit will draw readers in. Surprisingly, I don’t think read-through is too bad, though in book one I did catch quite a few typos and an inconsistency that I couldn’t believe I let slip by me. Editing book two will keep me on my toes because it follows the same timeline as book one. I remember when I was writing them that I needed more time, in the stories, I mean. There are four books that take place over two weeks, and the only way I could find the time for all four was to write book one and two during the same timeframe. Then three picks up the timeline and book four finishes out the two weeks. But I’ll have to double check all the characters and what they’re doing in book two line up with book one.

So, that’s what I’ll be doing in the next couple of months. While I’m working on these, I’ll try to remember to give my King’s Crossing books some love because I get way too focused on the current project at hand. I’ve always been this way, never stopping to enjoy the work I put into a book, but for some reason, I’m going to be absurdly proud of my A Rocky Point Wedding series when they’re all fixed up, and I may order some authors copies to give away at Christmas.

That’s about all I have going on here. It might sound like a lot, but I’m still taking the time to relax a bit and I’m watching A Discovery of Witches on Netflix. I already watched it once, but I liked it enough to watch it again. As far as health stuff, I wrote one last blog post on my mental health blog. Since I stopped drinking in June, I haven’t had nearly the anxiety and it’s difficult to write about anxiety if you’re not experiencing it. I still get nervous sometimes, that this is how I’ll feel for the rest of my life, but when the best of the best says, “It is what it is,” there’s not a lot that can be done. I won’t get into it anymore here. If you’re interested in that update, you can look here: https://chaoscoffeeandconfessions.blogspot.com/2024/09/nothing-good-in-good-situation.html

I might still write on it from time to time, to explore how I feel and what I’m doing. I’m trying to move forward the best I can, working on my books, trying to remember that it’s okay to take a break. I don’t think I’m going to be as hardcore in 2025 as I used to be. Things have changed, and I’m tired. I have my books figured out until August, and I need to find the fun in writing again. I have an idea for another standalone, about a woman who’s sister was involved in a kidnapping gone wrong, and my main character happens to fall in love with the boy’s father. I even have the cover for that one almost done, and I know I want it to be dark. Like depression, death, heartbreakingly dark. It might just be the thing to keep my spirits up because, like a lot of people these days, life has been kind of dragging me down.

Anyway, enough of that. There’s no point in wallowing. Life is good.

Have a good week, everyone!

The Weird In-Between: Thursday Thoughts

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Words: 1151
Time to read: 6 minutes

I think you all know I’m on a break. A “break.” I’ve said before after each release that I’m going to take a break. Refill my creative well like everyone likes to say. Rest. Recuperate. Reflect. I say it, and it lasts maybe a day before I’m back writing or editing another book.

Not this time. I’m holding true and actually…. reading. Watching a show on Netflix.

It’s weird. Quiet. Not all together pleasant.

The shadows of the urgency are still there. On Tuesday night I had my ex-husband and my sister over for dinner. Knee-jerk reaction to be annoyed my evening was gone, but then I had to remind myself that I’m not writing. Not editing. Not plotting. My sister stayed and we played Life with my daughter on her Switch. We played two games and my sister asked if we were going to play another. It was about 8:00pm. Everyone is used to me ending an evening before it practically starts and they fully expected me to say “No, I’m done.” I surprised everyone by saying, “Yeah, one more game.” Because…. I’m not writing. Not anxiously waiting to get back behind my keyboard to write another 1,000 words before bed.

Next week we’re going to a town forty-five minutes away to poke around and that night my sister and I are going to see Deadpool. A whole day, gone. Again, a knee-jerk reaction to be annoyed but I didn’t even have to remind myself I’m not writing to shake it off. Because, as surprising as it may be to you and to me, I want to do those things.

So I’m in this odd between space where I’m still blogging, still scrolling Threads for book news, still making graphics in Canva for what little marketing I do, but not writing or editing. Give & Take is scheduled to be a in a promotion soon, so this weekend I have to make graphics and write up a draft for my newsletter/blog. I did the cover for the next book I’m going to work on. It’s not set in stone–my covers go through a lot of changes before I hit upon the one I like best–but I like looking at it.

I don’t think it’s all because I’m feeling better or that I’m in the stages of acceptance that this is how I’m going to feel and there’s nothing more that can be done. It’s a big part of it, for sure, because I’ve said many times that I used writing and publishing to hide from how I felt. Not drinking much anymore helps, limiting myself to only two or three drinks a month. I broke that cycle and I’m feeling calmer and more serene than I have in a long time. Perhaps it’s a stepping back and wondering what I want from writing, because at this point I’m not sure what it’s given me or if I want to keep it.

I mean, I’m grateful it was there to hide behind. I don’t think anyone would resent a safety net. Writing, publishing, and the writing community gave me a place to go when the people in my life were tired of putting up with how I felt and how it affected me. (And I’m not stupid or naïve–I know I annoyed a lot of people not feeling well for so long.) I made a lot of friends, lost a lot of friends, too. I love helping people do their covers and edit and format for authors who are in a pinch. But I turned writing and publishing into kind of a conveyor belt of content, and only because I wasn’t feeling well enough to enjoy the product I was creating. I wrote fabulous stories, and I’m proud of all of them, but I didn’t savor them like I could have. And in saying that, I wonder how much better they could have been if I had. I don’t think I’m the only one who sometimes feels this way about their books. Indie publishing has turned into a rat race of content, not just for me. Like a shark that will drown if it can’t keep moving, indie publishing feels the same. If you can’t keep producing, you’ll sink, and that kind of thought, that kind of knowledge, that kind of fact, can wear you down fast.

I edited my King’s Crossing series while I was getting treatment, so I’m not sure how much better they are, or if the quality didn’t change. I won’t know if I don’t go back and reread some of the things I’ve written before, but I’m not too eager to do that. I recently re-edited my reader magnet and besides some typos and a small timeline inconsistency I doubt anyone noticed, I thought it sounded good. One of my best pieces, if I’m honest, because I shoved a lot of my misery into those characters. Maybe all my books are like that. That instead of my pain preventing me from creating amazing stories, it did the opposite and helped me create characters just as wounded as I was. If that’s the case though, I wonder how writing will be going forward. I mean, I’m not cured. I have the potential to feel worse as time goes on because endometriosis grows and maybe one day I’ll need another surgery to remove it, but for now, I’m feeling better, physically and mentally, than I have in years.

I suppose in the next few months I’ll be feeling my way around. I don’t want to be obsessed about writing anymore, but it does feel strange to have free time. I know finding a balance in all things will be easier said than done, but I fully plan to enjoy the next few months. Fall has always been my favorite time of the year and this year I’ll actually be able to appreciate the cooler temperatures and the leaves turning.

Anyway, I just wanted to share with you. I’m no longer struggling, not feeling like I’m drowning at least, more like treading water and realizing that I can stay afloat. I haven’t been able to enjoy anything for so long, and the simple fact that I can now leaves me reeling at times.

I hope you too, are able to find some enjoyment in your writing and publishing. I know I’m not the only one dealing with issues, mental or physical, but finding joy, no matter how small an amount, is imperative if you want to keep going and not burn out.

September will soon be upon us, and we’ll have only four months left of the year. Appreciate that time because it will move swiftly. Fall is in the air, a hint of woodsmoke and rain. Sip and savor. That will be my motto for the coming months. Wine, life, writing. I hope you can, too.

Until next time!

Monday’s Author Update (Mind, Body, and Soul)

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Words: 1631
Time to read: 9 minutes

I have a couple of things to talk about today, but surprisingly, my life has calmed down by a lot. My ARCs have been up since last Tuesday. I was able to upload them into Bookfunnel for my author website and upload all of them on Booksprout too. My reviewers there haven’t forgotten about me, and 41 out of 50 copies were taken for the first book. The numbers dwindle as the books go, but that’s to be expected–that’s how it is on the sales floor, too. Readers will be able to snag the books for a couple more weeks, but I have the first one set to release on the 16th of September. I haven’t put the preorder links up yet, so they aren’t on Amazon right now. I’m going to wait until I delete my links off my author website and the campaigns close on Booksprout. Since my books are dropping into KU after their preorders end, I’m just being careful. This was a big project for me, and I don’t want to screw it up. Here’s my publishing schedule if Amazon doesn’t give me a hard time:

Cruel Fate, Book One, September 16th, 2024
Cruel Hearts, Book Two, October 28th, 2024
Cruel Dreams, Book Three, December 9th, 2024
Shattered Fate, Book Four, January 20th, 2025
Shattered Hearts, Book Five, March 3rd, 2025
Shattered Dreams, Book Six, April 14th, 2025

I’m a little disappointed more haven’t dowloaded off my website. Books 2-6 have about 9 a piece, and book one has 12. That’s not terrible….if everyone leaves a review when the books release, between what I’m giving away and my Booksprout copies, I could potentially have 50 reviews a book. But, I know since these are spaced out, the potential people will forget is high. Booksprout will send reminder emails, and I’ll write blog post reminders, but there’s only so much you can do. If you want to see what I did with my ARCs and the series page I created on my website, you can look here: https://vmrheault.com/kings-crossing-series/

I’m holding true to my resolution to take a break while my ARCs are up, and I’ve been reading my favorite Nora Roberts book, The Villa. I love the story so much and it was a good choice to dip my toes back into reading. After that I want to read Sadie Kincaid’s Mafia series. I got hooked on those snippets when I was on TikTok trying it out for myself, and I have all of them borrowed in KU. You can find them here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BSQZPJ6H

Going forward, I’m going to try to find more of a balance between reading and writing. Since I saved up my books and the next standalone I’m going to release is in its editing stages, I feel like I have some wiggle room to actually read, go for walks, and spend more time with my kids while I’m getting this next book ready for publication.

I had another Mayo Clinic appointment on the 23rd, and my MRI showed signs of hysterectomy scarring and the presence of endometriosis. She didn’t recommend exploratory surgery to find out how much (which is the only way to know for sure), and I didn’t want it anyway. So my discomfort comes from nerve damage/scarring/endometriosis. There’s nothing more that can be done unless I want to try an anti-inflammatory diet–that I may look into–and I don’t have another appointment scheduled. I’m welcome to message her anytime, and I will have to next year when my lichen sclerosis cream runs out and I’ll need a refill on my ovary pills sometime next year as well. Whether she’ll want to talk to me during a virtual appointment, I’m not sure as she didn’t mention that, or she could just put the refills through my pharmacies if I’m not feeling any worse than I am now. I mean, I’m not feeling bad, but I’m not feeling good, and it’s disheartening to know that I’ll never feel “normal” again, even though I expected that kind of news before my appointment.

I’m still not drinking, limiting my alcohol intake to two, maybe three, drinks a month. Because of this, my anxiety is still under control, though I do get nervous from time to time. I get a little nauseous sometimes, but that could be from my ovary pills or from the endometriosis, since both cause that. My doctor hugged me when I left and said she was proud of the work I put in to feel better. I’m proud of myself, too, because I lived through some pretty bleak days, but she said she was especially proud I had the self-awareness to know drinking was causing me harm and knew enough to stop. She said some people get into a cycle where they don’t feel good so they drink, and then they feel worse because they’re drinking, and then they drink more because they don’t feel good. I never considered drinking could have such detrimental effects on your mind and body, but I can tell the difference. Now if I have something to drink I sip and savor. Life has changed since my first appointment in February, I’ll tell you that.

So, what’s next for me? I’m going to try to find balance in all ways. My body needs to adjust. I’m still not feeling well from the MRI I had on Friday (ironically, some kind of shot to slow my insides down gave me diarrhea), and I didn’t take the next day off to rest after my appoinments and traveling home so I worked all weekend. I’m going to try to walk more, especially now that the weather will be cooling down here shortly. My stamina is crap and I’ve gained a lot of weight since 2020. My series is done besides putting the books up on Amazon, so that’s a relief, and I’m going to try to find the joy I lost. Writing and publishing was more of a job I hated than something I started because I loved it, but that’s only because I used it to hide from how I was feeling. There’s no reason to do that anymore. I’ll never feel normal again, but I know the reasons why and that’s huge when it comes to my mental health. It’s scary when you’re sick and no one can tell you why, and they don’t want to find out for you, either.

It’s still in the back of my mind to write up my experiences and publish them in hopes of helping other women like me. One website said that women who have vulva lichen sclerosis live with it for 5-15 years before being diagnosed. I had it for four and felt like I was going out of my mind. I had other issues, like my ovaries out of whack because of my hysterectomy, but even so, women’s medical care leaves a lot to be desired, and if telling my story could help someone, then I think I should do it. I’d like to do it soon while all the details are fresh in my mind, but regurgitating all that could be triggering too. I’ll never forget the callous way my doctors treated me. Even lying to me in some cases, and being treated like that is just as difficult as living with whatever is hurting you. What’s sad is that I know people have been treated far worse than I have, and though I’ll never feel normal again, people live with worse pain, conditions, and symptoms than what I have. I have a lot to be grateful for after all is said and done and in the coming months and years I’ll be looking for peace to come to terms with what I’ve gone through.

I’m not sure how this will affect my writing, if it will. I don’t feel like writing and publishing is as important as they once were. I was using it as a shield to hide from how I was feeling, and I don’t need to do that anymore. I can write because I want to. I can publish because I’m proud of the story and want people to read it, not because I need the distraction and something to do to forget how crappy I feel. It will be interesting to see if I can find that joy again, the joy I had for writing and publishing prior to 2020, or if I’m so different now after those negative experiences that I’ll never feel the same way. I did the cover for the standalone I’m releasing next year, and it makes me excited for the book. I know I need the break though, a real break, so I’m not going to jump into editing it. Finding balance will be harder than it sounds, but I have to remind myself that it’s okay to slow down and rest. With as abysmal as my sales are, there’s no reason to rush anyway. No one’s buying and it could be a combination of things, but the bottom line is the books and readers will always be there so there’s no harm in taking some time for myself.

Anyway, that’s all I have for today. At some point I’m going to write the instructions on how to create an ebook cover out of the PDF full cover book wrap. A couple people have read my blog post on how to make a full wrap in Canva and they asked for directions on how to turn that PDF into an ebook cover. It’s quite simple, really, but it will be good to have those instructions out there, I think.

Have a good Monday, everyone! Take care of yourselves, and take a break! You’ll be thankful you did.

Why My Books Will Stay in KU…For Now

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Words: 2649
Time to read: 14 minutes

There’s been a fair amount of talk whether an author should go into KU (Kindle Unlimited on the reader side or Kindle Select on the author side) or publish their books wide, meaning on all platforms like Kobo, Apple Books, Nook, etc. You can do that easily by uploading to a place like Draft2Digital or PublishDrive. You should always go direct where you can, Kobo being the easiest, so you can earn more, but that’s a different topic for a different day.

It’s personal choice to go wide or stay in KU, and a lot of authors try to have it both ways, releasing into KU then going wide after their 90 days is up, or doing the opposite, going wide and then yanking everything down after a set amount of time, a month or so, and putting their book into KU. I’ve heard some authors even put a first in series into KU hoping to force KU readers to buy the rest to finish the series or forcing wide readers to buy on Amazon rather than their preferred platform.

I used to get disgusted, you know, authors trying to find the short cut to success, but after eight years in the business, I don’t care what other authors do anymore. For one, they have to do what they think is best for their books and for another, well, if they want to look bad to potential readers and to platforms like Kobo and Apple Books who actually do pay attention to what indies are doing, that’s their business. I’m not saying every way is a bad way. I know big indie authors like Lindsay Buroker and Mark Dawson offer their books using all kinds of various methods, but I’ve also seen indies try to sell their books in whatever way possible, regardless if they hurt readers . . . or their reputations.

I tried going wide once, and I lasted six months or so. That was back when I was writing in 3rd person, my books weren’t that great, and I had no idea about marketing. See, the thing is, it doesn’t matter where you publish if you can’t push readers there (and your books aren’t good). The only thing going wide will do is give you more zeroes to look at on more platforms. And that’s another thing authors really don’t understand–KU readers are different from wide readers. When you ask a KU reader if they buy books that are wide, most will say no because KU offers enough of a selection that they don’t have to. They have their favorite authors and Amazon is adding more books to KU all the time. Authors are delusional when they think they can force readers to buy their books by being scammy. KU readers don’t have to fall for it. Al says there are over 4 million books in KU right now (versus the 1.5 million books in Kobo Plus) so it’s just better to understand who your reader is going to be and where they are going to read your books. Anyway, I switched back to KU because it was better for my mental health. I didn’t like looking at the low sales everywhere, and being available in libraries didn’t make up for it. For me, being in KU was a better choice and still is. Here are the reasons why my books will stay in KU (for the foreseeable future):

I don’t hate Amazon, and I don’t hate that KU requires exclusivity.
The other day on Threads someone said they deserve to be in KU without the exclusivity, and I wondered which planet she came from. Life isn’t fair. Amazon doesn’t owe you anything. If you think you deserve to be in a subscription program without being exclusive, join Kobo Plus. There’s less competition over there anyway. Amazon is never going to change a platform they created for a device they invented. Through KDP and CreateSpace, back in the day when their paperback branch was called that, they gave us the tools to self-publish. Without them, it’s hard to tell how long it would have taken for indie publishing to develop into what it is now. I’m not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I’m grateful to Amazon for the opportunities they’ve given us, and I’ll die on this hill.

I like that it’s income-friendly.
Times are tough. I read books enrolled KU and I offer my books there. I know Kobo Plus is cheaper (KU is $11.99 and Kobo Plus is $7.99 US), but Kindle Unlimited offers more books and a lot of the romance authors I like include their books there. So not only is it a personal choice because of my limited funds, but it’s a business choice because I know thousands of people are in similar situations. Sometimes I get asked if I mind I earn less on a book read in KU than if someone buys it, but I don’t. I make the same amount if two people read in KU versus one person outright buying it, but I just think I’m getting two for the price of one. I’d rather have one reader for a lower royalty than none.

I don’t believe my books are susceptible to piracy any more than other books.
People love to blame KU and Amazon for their books ending up on pirate sites, but I think this energy could be directed elsewhere. The minute you upload anything to anywhere online, your information can get stolen. A well-known author used one of my graphics I made in Canva during her 20booksto50k presentation. (I used it in a blog post on this website and I imagine it popped up in a Google search when she was looking for a graphic to use.) I was surprised to see my design on her PowerPoint (especially since it would have been very easy to create her own), but I never said anything. I was kind of tickled she liked it enough to use it, but that’s just one example of how anyone can help themselves to your work. There’s no one stopping anyone from copying and pasting my words here to create their own blog posts. My books are on pirate sites, and while we like to accuse Amazon of suspending accounts for this, they are reasonable and understand you can’t stop piracy. The issue is authors who like to try to game the system, and I don’t blame Amazon for cracking down. If anything, we can blame other indies for their “shoot now and ask questions later” approach to dealing with us. For every ten honest indies, there’s one who has to ruin it for everyone.

I think being in KU is easier.
Without KU, I wouldn’t be making any money. Going wide is hard. It takes consistency and perseverance. It takes marketing know-how and cash to push readers to all the platforms. I’m not saying that overall KU is any easier or I’d be making bank and wouldn’t still have to log into my day job, but I think it’s easier to push specific readers at one platform. “My books are in KU.” That’s all I have to say and that weeds out anyone who doesn’t have a subscription. Those people aren’t my readers. (Unless they want to be, because I do sell ebooks here and there). I don’t sell many paperbacks and don’t push paperbacks at anyone. All my ads on Facebook say my books are in KU. Sometimes, if I remember, I’ll put the KU logo on the graphic. Being part of a huge ecosystem of books on a platform that is known for selling books makes sense to me, and it frees up a lot of headspace to think about other things.

I’m not scared of Amazon.
This is probably a big thing for a lot of people. They’re scared they’re going to do something and their account is going to get suspended. I mean, I know it can happen. At the base, Amazon is run by bots, and then if you need something, a lot of times their first level of support is someone overseas. I applaud anyone who can speak more than one language because I sure as hell can’t, but sometimes language barriers prevent you from being understood. I’ve had run-ins with Amazon–they blocked a large print book accusing me of trying to publish duplicate content (ah, yeah, it was!) even though I checked the Large Print box when I tried to publish. Despite having been able to publish large print in the past, they wouldn’t let me, and after a couple of go-arounds with KDP support, I gave up.

The other time was last year when they asked me for licensing proof for the stock photos for Twisted Lies. I had what they needed, and eventually they accepted the licensing screenshots I gave them of my DepositPhotos account. I say “eventually” because I sent it in the first time and it was accepted and he told me to publish again. When I tried again, the book was flagged a second time. I submitted everything again, and that time they put it through. Pretty basic stuff from what I hear, but it doesn’t make me not worry. Running your own business is stressful and even if you’re not exclusive, you can still have your account terminated. Being wide doesn’t necessarily get you around that, especially if you really do want Amazon to sell your books because they have the lion’s share of the market in the United States. What you can do is join an organization like ALLi (Alliance of Independent Authors) who have connections at Amazon and can speak up on your behalf. I’ve been a member for a couple of years now, and they have other benefits. It’s $119.00 a year, USD, but because you’re running a business and deal with other businesses every day, I consider it an investment and write it off when my accountant does my taxes.

I’m not scared of having all my eggs in one basket.
I know this is a concern for a lot of people, and the big indies who are making six or seven figures have multiple streams of income. They have ebooks, audio, print, and translations. They offer special editions of their books. They get offers to join in book boxes. They write nonfiction and speak at conferences. They travel to book signings and reader events. They have Patreons and/or sell merchandise. I completely understand that is the way to go, but I’m small, really still consider myself a baby author despite how many books I have out. Audio isn’t possible for me right now, and I do all my own covers, formatting, and editing. The work I do on the side I do for free or accept whatever they can pay because I know life is tough and I do it to be helpful, not to make money. Maybe one day I can afford to produce audio books or pay a translator since the German market is pretty solid from what I hear, but keeping my books only in KU right now is a good fit for me. Yeah, I do publish my paperbacks everywhere because I don’t think IngramSpark is as hard to work with as people say it is. At least, I’ve never had a problem with the platform and either being part of the 20booksto50k group or being a member of ALLi has given me the resources to forgo the fees. And because I do my own covers, I can do them with what IngramSpark needs without the extra cost.

After eight years of publishing, my readers know my books will be in Kindle Unlimited.
Being in KU is part of my marketing strategy and part of my brand. I’ve been writing and publishing for eight years, or only two, I guess, if you just want to count the last couple of years when I created a pen name, started publishing first person Billionaire, and really tried to get serious about my career and where it’s headed, but I think by now, any reader who has found me and read any of my books, especially my series, knows my books are in KU. Probably one of the things authors have a tough time wrapping their heads around is consistency because when we talk about consistency, we’re talking about years of work. It’s really tough to think about what you’re doing tomorrow, and when we talk publishing schedules or a five- or ten-year business plan, you’re expected to look ahead, and by a lot. Part of marketing is training readers to know where to find you. You can’t do that skipping around from wide to KU and then back again. Part of marketing is training readers to know what you write, and you can’t do that skipping around from genre to genre. No one likes that when I say it, but it’s true. When your department store moves things around and you can’t find anything, you get mad, right? You have a favorite restaurant and it closes, or someone is parked in “your spot” at work. Consistency is comfortable, not a box like some authors think it is, and if you can realize readers love consistency and trust you to provide it in what you write, how often you publish, and where you publish your books, the easier marketing will feel. “Build it, and they will come” might not be so easy, but I think “Build it, remain consistent, and they will stay” can be pretty truthful. Anyway, I have a whole blog post on consistency, and you can read it here: https://vaniamargene.com/2021/12/20/buzzword-consistency/

Every business needs flexibility, and I’ve proven to myself that when I’m flexible, like pivoting from third person to first, that it can make a real difference. So while I’m happy being in KU, and I’m okay with the limitations that go along with it, I may be open to doing something different if circumstances change or an opportunity presents itself. Amazon may be a cornerstone in our communities, but there’s no guarantee it will last forever. (Which is why I don’t depend on free ISBNs from anyone.) Sometimes I do get bummed because I can’t do whatever I want with my books, but for now, being in KU still feels like the right decision. I don’t have a PA to deal with uploading to multiple platforms or to create graphics and social posts. I don’t have time to submit to promos on Kobo or Apple Books. I just don’t feel like I have time to push my books in a hundred different places so readers can find me. I can run an Amazon ad or I can run a Facebook ad to just Amazon and call it a day. Since I haven’t felt good for a while, that’s all the energy I really have and if you have more time and energy to devote to the marketing part of your business rather than the writing part, you do what you can do and be grateful for it.

I look at choosing between KU and being wide like this: You know how you’re in a grocery store and the lines are long. You have somewhere you need to be so you try with all your might to figure out the fastest lane. You spot one with only two people in it, and what’s this? They both have baskets, not carts. Score! But, but! You have no idea the cashier is in training and it will take him longer to check out those two people than the experienced cashier checking out the longer lines.

Hopping around from wide to KU and back again is like that. You’re looking for the fastest way to success when really, only consistency and hard work will get you there.

Choose a lane, grab a cookie out of your cart, and wait.

One day you’ll reach the parking lot.

Until next time!

Monday’s Author Update

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Words: 1450
Time to read: 8 minutes

I don’t have much to say this week. I was able to finish proofing my proofs and I tweaked their covers. They looked plain, like they were missing something. I had made a series logo when I had the other covers, but with the colored lights, the logo didn’t fit anymore and I had to figure out something else. I really like the bokeh city background. I think it fits in with my other covers and the brand I’ve been able to create with all my books so I didn’t want to change it once I found it.

The tagline doesn’t add much, but I think it fills in the emptiness and balances out all the text at the bottom. I bolded the font (in Canva, if there’s not a choice to bold a font, you can duplicate it and lay it on top of the first which is what I had to do here) and it actually doesn’t look too bad in person. I won’t bother to take a picture of it because it wouldn’t look right anyway, but I’m pleased with how they look and besides moving the guy up on the sixth book, the covers are good. Here are all my covers together, besides my series, if you wanted to see them side by side:

Some might say not being able to read the tagline is a concern, especially at thumbnail size, but it will be bolded on the Amazon product page in the blurb section, so it’s mostly for decoration at this point.

I still have a lot to do–I haven’t even paged through the proofs yet, just opened the box to see how the tagline looked on the covers. I need to make sure the interiors are okay, that I added and took out everything I wanted, change the chapter headers because the paperback and ebook chapter headers have to be different, and then create the ebook files, for both Amazon and Bookfunnel. For six books, that will likely take me all day, and then I still have to create download pages for Bookfunnel and upload the files. I decided that I’m going to put all the ARCs up first before putting my preorders up on Amazon. I just want to do things one step at a time, and I’ll put my ARCs up for a couple of weeks first. I plan to run a Facebook ad to my website to encourage readers to download and I’m also going to use Booksprout since I’ve been nurturing a following there. I was a little hesitant putting the ARCs up while they were on preorder because I don’t want to upset the Amazon gods in any way, and I’d prefer links not being up in other places if they’re on Amazon, even if they’re only available for preorder.

If you’re wondering why I haven’t dug into any of that yet, it’s because I was stupid. On Saturday I had the entire day ahead of me, and instead of reading a book that I didn’t write or making graphics for social media, I opened my reader magnet and started reading My Biggest Mistake.

I didn’t have any intention of editing it, but once I started reading, I started changing things here and there, getting rid of some echoing, that kind of thing. My Vellum file says I last edited it in January of 2023, and while I did a good job, I’m finding things to fix to make it sound better. The story is still solid–I’m only changing things on a paragraph and sentence basis, and not even much of that. I started reading it because I really enjoy the story, and since I’ve been lightly editing it, I’m almost sorry I’m giving this book away. Despite the changes I’ve made so far, it’s one of my better books, deep and angsty, my characters saving each other from the choices they’ve made.

I don’t know how I could sell it and not feel bad since it’s free on my website, and I don’t want to put it for free anywhere since it does encourage visitors to my blog. I’m still giving away copies, about one every two days, though I’m not sure if I’ve been getting new subscribers. I exported my list from MailerLite and fed my list into my website, but since then the numbers have remained steady, though WordPress gives me a notification now and then I have a new subscriber. I’ve been blogging more, trying to get the word out, so I guess if people are getting sick of that, they’ve unsubscribed.

I don’t pay attention to those kinds of numbers, but I would feel bad if I took down my free book. I’ve been giving it away since practically I wrote it–it’s basically part of my brand now.

Anyway, so I enjoyed reading that and it will be better for it besides.

I have a Mayo Clinic appointment on the 23rd, and my sister is taking advantage of the trip to see a dermatologist for her eczema. I’ll be gone August 21-23 and I’ll try to get as much done as I can before then. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get my ARCs up. It would be nice if I could, because once those go up, I’ll be able to take another break. I haven’t been feeling lousy, and it would be fun to actually enjoy this trip down to the Cities–maybe eat at a place we never have before and I want to hit up Half Price Books in Apple Valley, if time allows. I haven’t been in there for a long time, and they may have some craft books I haven’t read yet.

Otherwise, that’s about all I have going on. I’m having an MRI done at one of my appointments, and I think she’s going to tell me I have endometriosis. This isn’t the blog for that, but I’ve been going down there every three months since February and if she wants to see me again, I’m going to put her off until December, or even January. I’d like to enjoy the holidays this year since even though I’m not cured, I’m feeling better, AND my 50th birthday falls on US’s Thanksgiving Day. That has got to be some kind of omen, you’d think. Better things coming for 2025, maybe? Not sure. I’m too hesitant after everything that’s happened to hope.

One thing at a time, at any rate, and getting those ARCs up is what I’m going to be working on this week. My sister and I are dragging my daughter (who is eighteen) to see Twisters (the second time for my sister and me) and I’m looking forward to that. When the original Twister came out, I saw it in the movie theatre thirteen times. There’s just something about seeing a movie like that on the big screen as often as you can. Probably the only good thing I can say about COVID is that the theatres were forced to regurgitate old movies, and my sister and I were able to see Titanic a couple of times in the theatre. She’s young enough she never saw it on the big screen. We made my daughter go to that one too, and I was pleased she sniffled through the entire thing, even though she gave us a hard time for forcing her to go.

Sales are slow at the moment, and there’s nothing to report there. The only thing that will breathe life into my sales now, I’m afraid, is publishing again, and I’ll get on that soon enough. I’ve heard lots of reports of August being a slow month (which I don’t really believe because the world is a big place), and I almost regret putting out my series during an election year. Stupid politics. I have a bad feeling that fiasco is going to ruin my launch and I can only hope the series hangs in there until after the New Year because I’ll be releasing into summer of 2025. But, never fear, it’s the first year my daughter can vote and I’m running her little butt up to the polling place because we both understand the assignment. Besides, I’ve benefited from living in Minnesota. Tim Walz is great, and I would love for the rest of the country to benefit from all he’s done for us, too.

I don’t get political often, and I hope if you’re publishing around that time, too, that you have a great launch!

That’s all I have for today. Good luck this week, keep your chin up if you’re going through the usual garbage. Take care of yourselves.

Until next time!

Monday Musings and Author Update

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It feels like it took forever, but I finally finished proofing the paperback proofs of my series. I would have thought since I was feeling better that proofing would have gone faster, but I was distracted just as I would have been if I had still been feeling bad. I can’t blame my health… I’m happy to say that besides looking for snippets for social media (what little I post) I’ll never have to read these again and that probably had more to do with it than anything else. Though, I did get a little teary-eyed when I finished. This is a bittersweet goodbye, for sure.

Overall, I’m very happy with the changes I made–some of the paragraphs needed some plumping up, even after having gotten this far. You just see, and feel, things differently when you read your book as a book. There’s still plenty of work to do, starting with putting in the edits. That always takes me longer than it should because I check and double-check that I’m not editing in typos. I also tweaked the covers and I’ll be checking those changes when I order new proofs along with the formatting. Then, after everything looks good, I have to make ebook files out of the paperback PDFs. Putting changes into six books was enough–there was no way I was doing twelve–but I’ll do that when I’m ready to put the ARCs up. I’m going to make a separate page for this series on my website, including a list of FAQs about the ARCs, Bookfunnel links when they’re ready, and trigger warnings. I still have a lot to do, but I feel like the hardest part is behind me. I can put on some music, make a cup of coffee, and have fun with what I have left.

In other news that’s not boring, I saw on my podcast app that the Self Publishing Show, the podcast that was hosted by Mark Dawson and James Blatch, recorded their last episode. I was a little sad to hear that since they’ve been a staple in the indie publishing community for as long as I’ve been around (2016) and longer. It’s not really a surprise though, considering I listened to a podcast maybe a month ago, and I was confused as to why James hosted that episode alone. No one talks about Mark’s (alleged?) plagiarizing, forcing him to step back, and I guess he’s coping with the aftermath. I’m not a part of the 20booksto50k group on Facebook any longer, nor am I member of the Self Publishing Formula anymore so I don’t have the inside scoop, if they were even mumbling about it. In a different group that I can’t remember now, one person said James was retiring from the podcast because it was too much to handle alone.

Considering they record for YouTube, production of the podcast probably was a lot. It also makes me wonder if they could afford to keep it going, if they’re tightening their purse strings and decided paying their team to produce the podcast was just too much. I have no idea how many indies faded away from their group and stopped buying the ads course and their Self Publishing 101 course because they didn’t want to be associated with Mark anymore. In that vein, I’m sure they planned out guests months in advance, and maybe they just couldn’t find people willing to be part of their podcast anymore.

I don’t have much information on their conference they held in London in June, but it sounds like they still had a good turnout. I can’t find any mention about Mark and if he made an appearance or if James handled it alone. If he did, he may not want to do that anymore, either. The way Craig Martelle talked about organizing the 20booksto50k conference in Vegas every year, it’s a lot, and maybe James won’t want to do it without Mark. It’s impossible to say if their friendship took a hit. We may never know the behind-the-scenes details like that.

I liked Mark, what I knew of him through podcast interviews and how he and James would interact at the beginning of each podcast episode. I’m not spreading gossip or rumors with a malicious intent–I’m simply wondering what’s going on and mourning a podcast I listened to pretty frequently as many did. If you want to listen to the last episode with guests Joe Solari and KDP’s Darren Hardy, you can listen to it here.

Listening to Joe Solari talk about Author Nation coming up in November, it did make me realize that I won’t want to go to any future [20booksto50k] conferences. I missed out on the conferences when they were the way I wanted to participate, and my chance is gone now. Author Nation is too big, too bright, for me and my fledgling author career.

I don’t know if there are any self-publishing conferences out there anymore geared toward authors who haven’t “made it.” Bryan Cohen and Jim Kukral hosted one in Chicago before the pandemic and it was fantastic. I met authors who just published their first book to authors who were making a living wage. Their panels (for everyone, they weren’t breakout sessions) were informative and I was able to ask questions anonymously, which took away the stress. I met up with a friend from Twitter, and overall I had a good time. Maybe I’m not in the loop anymore (which wouldn’t be surprising) but I don’t see these types of conferences offered. The ones I see are huge, requiring authors to make a certain amount to be invited in, like NINC. I should probably connect to some romance writers associations. A lot of the chapters under the RWA went out independently and they do host conferences, even if they’re just virtual. I kind of lost that side of my writing while I wasn’t feeling well, focused more on writing and creating to try to forget about how I felt. I’m missing that, and in the coming months, now that my series is done, I should think about adding it back.

Especially since connecting with people is so hard. I post on Threads, and most of my posts don’t even get 30 views. How can authors connect with other authors that way? I know my opinions aren’t always popular (don’t care about things other people foam at the mouth over), and I don’t have a cat to take pictures of anymore. And on that note, I’m going to stop answering questions on Threads. I get nothing back for answering someone’s question. Yeah, I’m tired and bitter. I don’t need to spend five minutes typing out a response to get a heart reaction. If they can’t take five seconds to type a “thank you!” then I’m not going to bother. They can depend on others for the information they could look up online. I used to think Twitter was bad, but I’m gritting my teeth thinking Threads is actually worse. I’ve been used in the past. It’s not fun and rather not keep up with that tradition. In fact, it takes a toll on my mental heath, and you can read a post where I wrote about that particular subject here: https://chaoscoffeeandconfessions.blogspot.com/2024/07/garbage-doesnt-always-take-itself-out.html

I think that’s about all I have for today. I’ll be taking some time off from writing–not blogging, for this blog or my author blog–but I’m not going to work on another book for a bit. I’ve accomplished a lot since December of 2019, and saying goodbye to my King’s Crossing series at the same time as finally getting some answers for my health issues (though not the kind of outcome I was hoping for) is kind of a turning point. I’m finding some equilibrium with my health and where my publishing is going. I love writing and publishing, but honestly I thought pivoting to first person present and niching down to Billionaire would do more for me and while it has, I’m still not seeing the results I was hoping for. Nobody’s fault, but you know how it is. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. I don’t want to stop, but I’ve been banging my head against a brick wall and I need to find a pillow instead so it doesn’t hurt so much.

Before I say, “Until next time!” you know I love sharing other authors’ journeys, and when I was talking to a friend yesterday morning and she mentioned all she learned posting to free sites like Wattpad, I asked her to write something about it for my blog. She said she already did for hers, so if you want to read about an author’s experience using free sites that led to her publishing through KDP, you can read it here. We all start somewhere, right? Even if it feels like years later we’re still in the same place. https://ananyascribblesaround.wordpress.com/2021/08/08/i-used-to-post-my-stories-online-for-free-and-i-dont-regret-it/

Thanks for your time, and I hope you have a great week!

Until next time!

Author Update and Separating the Art from the Artist

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paint colors and paint brushes lying flat on desk with purple flowers text says author udpate and separating the art from the artist

I hope this Monday has gotten off to a good start for all of you and that you enjoyed the holiday if you celebrated.

I was able to get a lot of proofing done and managed to finish book three, put in the changes into the Vellum file, and start on book four. If I can get a book a week done for the rest of the month, I may actually be able to put up my ARCs in August and get all my preorders scheduled, too. Sometimes I get stuck reading the same paragraph over and over again, or I get distracted and have to reread a page to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I’m still thinking about my health, though not as much as I used to since I stopped drinking. That has made me feel better, lessened my anxiety, and took away a lot of the bloating I was experiencing, not only in my belly, but in my entire body. But I get distracted by social media and generally just my thoughts bouncing around because I’ve read these books so many times, and to be honest, I enjoy the second couple more than the first. I hope the second three books will go even faster since I like reading their stories.

Anyway, progress is being made, even if it feels slow to me, and the end is in sight. I started blogging about my books on my author site and I did get some opens from the email part of it, and some views from the WordPress reader. I reminded everyone they could download My Biggest Mistake and got some takers for that too. Though I don’t want to bother anyone, while I’m getting this series up and going, I’ll up my blog posts over there to twice a month. I’ll be introducing characters, sharing blurbs, talking about character inspiration, etc. I can’t let my boredom get in the way of promoting these books. I’ve worked on them for four and a half years, yes, and I’m tired, but there’s a reason why I worked so hard on them and putting them out without any promotion only to watch them sink would be insulting to all the hours I put into this series. So, I will do my best to build buzz and hope that it works.

In other news, there’s a lot of disappointment on Threads (it’s really the only place I hang out to get my book news) about Neil Gaiman, in that he’s being accused of sexual assault by two young women. If you want to read the story and listen to the accompanying podcast episodes, you can look here: https://www.tortoisemedia.com/2024/07/03/exclusive-neil-gaiman-accused-of-sexual-assault/

I’m not going to debate anyone as to whether or not you think this is true, that’s not what this blog post is about. It’s about artists who behave badly. For a long time, JK Rowling was top news, people calling her a TERF because of the views she posts on Twitter (now X). I was never invested in Harry Potter–never read the books, didn’t watch the movies–so when her true colors started coming out, it wasn’t a loss to me like it was to millions of people. Neil Gaiman is the same. I have never read any of his books, have never watched any of the TV shows that are based off his books, but that doesn’t mean I’m not let down. We want the artists we admire to be decent people, and it’s sad and disheartening when we see evidence to the contrary.

I’ve been disappointed when it comes to actors and actresses, and I try not to let it bother me. I really liked Brad Pitt until rumors and allegations started coming out about how he treated Angelina Jolie and their children. I was a Johnny Depp fan, too, until all that stuff between him and Amber Heard came out. I barely knew who Amber Heard was, but I wasn’t racing to the movies to see Aquaman 2, either. It’s really difficult to enjoy art made by people who you know are crummy human beings.

And, of course, we can always move things closer to home. I have two huge paintings (6 feet by 3 feet) painted for me by my ex-fiancé.

They’re massive, and he sent them to me in a huge crate made of wood and particle board (we met on Twitter in 2016 and he lives in Georgia). I asked him to paint them for me, and, surprisingly, he did. They’re gorgeous, and two years after I broke things off, they’re still on my walls. One reason is because they’re so big, no matter what I decide to do with them will be a hassle. Two, because I don’t want to just give them away. I’d like to sell them, but again, that just seems like a big pain in the butt. Truthfully, he treated me like garbage for most of our relationship, lying to me and making promises he never intended to keep. He said he was in therapy to deal with some of his mental health issues, but he could never remember his therapist’s last name so I could look him up. Big red flag. We were in a long-distance relationship for a five years, and honestly, while I was dealing with my health issues and hysterectomy in 2022, I just couldn’t take it anymore. So, it would be nice if I could get rid of his paintings hanging on my walls, wash my hands of the whole thing, and move on from the last four years of my life as well as I can. There’s not much I can salvage or want to salvage from our relationship, and to heal, mentally while I’m healing physically, I just need to completely let go.

I’ve seen careers take a hit because people insist on being their “true selves” online. One writer was ousted from an anthology for his MAGA views and being a Trump supporter. The other writers didn’t want to work with him, and they threatened to pull out of the anthology if the person putting it together didn’t push him out. I’m not suggesting you hide who you are (yes, please let us know so we can avoid you!) but the fact is, constantly voicing your thoughts and opinions about politics and religion will inevitably rub someone the wrong way because your points of view on those kinds of things can tell someone a lot about you. After witnessing that for weeks, months, or even years, they may decide you’re not the kind of person they want to be associated with.

People argue about this, mostly so they can retain their right to leave poor reviews on their peers’ books (and why would you do that when you could lift someone up instead?), but when you decide to become an artist/author and set up a social media presence, what you put out there is for public consumption and I feel you should behave accordingly. You may insist you have a right to voice your opinions, but people also have a right to disagree with you and you’re courting mob mentality. I’ve been a victim of that a time or two, and not even on a large scale. People decide to pile on and before you know it, you have to delete your social media account. That’s a worst case scenario, I’ve never taken an account down, but it’s a real hit to your mental health and self-esteem.

When we behave badly or express our opinions online, we’re taking the chance that we’re going to let our fans down. I would never want someone to not want to read my books because of something they saw online or because of something I did. It’s difficult to enjoy something made by someone you know is a jerk, and it can be worse when they’re more than just jerks. They hurt people, like Neil Gaiman hurt those two women, or like JK Rowling hurts trans people whenever she opens her mouth.

Can you separate the art from the artist? Sometimes you can, sometimes you can’t. I wouldn’t avoid a movie that had Brad Pitt in it, but I wouldn’t watch it just because he’s in it. I’ve managed to tolerate the paintings in my living room, looking at them without seeing them, but I don’t know how much longer I’ll do that, even if they are beautiful. We get invested in who we think these people are through their work and how they act during public events, and then when their (private?) actions portray a different kind of person, we feel betrayed. No one is perfect, and I guess it’s up to each person to decide how much imperfection we can deal with before we decide it’s not worth it. I don’t want to support someone who’s not a good person, giving them my money when they don’t deserve it, and I feel fortunate I didn’t get invested Harry Potter, or any of Neil Gaiman’s work, or any of Kevin Spacey’s projects. The list can go on, really, and all we can do is stand by the artists who are decent people–until they prove to us they’re not.

Have a good week everyone!